perspective.

i'm not gonna lie, i'm disappointed right now. i could say "it's just a game" or i could abandon the vikings altogether and be a fairweather fan (Like i'm sure most of minnesota will do tomorrow). but i truly am disappointed. i'm not mad at the vikings - what gives me a right to criticize their playing anyway? all i've done this season is sit on the couch and watch sportscenter and sunday games.

but i had to know this was coming. i'm from minnesota. when is the last time a minnesota team topped off a fantastic season with a championship? by my records it's been nearly 20 years - the 1991 world series win was a long time ago. in my lifetime i can name 7 great minnesota sports seasons that didn't end in a championship:

january 17th, 1999: minnesota vikings lose to the atlanta falcons in the NFC championship because of a missed extra point. they had been 15-1 in the regular season.

2001 nfc championship: underdogs who fought their way to the NFC championship, the vikings lose the game to the NY giants, shutout 41-0.

2004 nba western finals: after a top-seeded record-setting season, the timberwolves were eliminated in the 3rd round of the playoffs by the lakers. they were the underdog team that beat the denver nuggets and sacramento kings in two incredible playoff series. only to be eliminated the round before the NBA finals.

2006: after the most incredible end-of-season comeback by the minnesota twins to get the playoff spot against the detroit tigers. the twins had the CY young winner, the MVP, and the batting champ (3 separate players!) on their roster that season. the oakland athletics swept them in the first round of the playoffs.

2008: the twins again stage an insane comeback that led to a tie-breaking game 163 against the white sox. the winner would go to the playoffs. the coin toss sent the game to chicago. the twins lost 1-0.

2009: mid-june the twins had no chance at the playoffs. in august they were 9 games behind the detroit tigers. they finished the season strong, sweeping the royals all while watching the white sox sweep the tigers. again they forced a game 163 - which was played at the metrodome. the twins won this one. only to be swept by the yankees in the first round of the playoffs.

2010: minnesota vikings begin their season 7-0, and end it 12-4, earning the 2nd seed in the NFC. they demolish the cowboys in the 2nd round of the playoffs. they advance to the NFC championship yet again. with 19 seconds left and in field goal range, brett favre (the oldest QB ever in a playoff game) throws an interception, sending the game into overtime. the saints win the coin toss and proceed to get a game-winning 40-yard field goal.

---------------------------
i could call minnesota the state of choke-artists or failures, but they're not. the point is i love watching them. they are good guys (minus the love boat scandal..) who love what they do. and while it'd be fun to win a world series or a super bowl, i still love watching teams fight to get that top seed. if i knew that the twins would never again win a world series, i'd still cheer for them. i'd still go to as many games as i could. same with the vikings. both the twins and the vikings have some of the lowest payrolls in professional sports and that's what i love about them. our rosters aren't made up of a bunch of hot shots, but a bunch of guys who love sports.

i'm disappointed tonight. not because the vikings "let me down" but because i wanted them to get to the super bowl. for them. for their great season. for their hard work throughout the season. i could complain about the "questionable calls" or the unsportsmanlike defense or the mass amount of turnovers. but none of that matters. the vikings had a great season and i loved every second of it. even tonight as i paced back and forth in front of the tv screaming in fear and joy, i loved watching that game.

thanks vikes for a great season. we'll see you next year at your letdown game and we'll be behind you in it. and same with you twins, you'll drive me crazy during september and let me down during october. but i still love ya.

2009

i suppose i am just about 18 days late on a recap post of 2009. but cliches have never stopped me before, so i suppose i could write a brief summary of my life in the past year.

it's funny to me to read the posts that i was posting around this time last year, most arguably so my 2008 recap. month by month i recalled the mishaps, emotions, and stories of each month. all chronicling a selfish life that..to be honest..had little to do with God. it's funny to have these posts to remind me of someone who i used to be...someone God is making new. i guess you could say 2009 is the year that God won me back.

the opening hours of 2009 were pitiful...perhaps some of the worst hours of my life. ya know that phrase "how you start your year is how you will end it"? i'm glad to say (this is a foreshadow) that how 2009 started and how it ended were polar opposites...not only in my activities, but in my soul.

i have come a long way. Christ called me back in April...called me out of my life of sin...out of a life of lies and shame...and into a relationship with Him, free of the burdens of sin. i'm sure you've heard (or even said) a sentence like the previous many times. so had i. but i never understood it until He called my number. ya see, i had been living a life in secret, a life behind lies, and God had a different plan for me. not just because He hated sin, but more so because He loved me. He knew that these lies would always get between us because i let them. and i finally let them go.

i always thought there was freedom in lying. i could be anyone i wanted. my family could be this ironic ideal. my dating history could be an overflowing black book. my life was a compilation of shenanigans. but on the other side of truth, i've found a new freedom. to be who i was created to be.

in the past year i've been in 21 states, including a 9-week stint in alaska. God is showing me a world that needs some restoration and asking me if i want to be a part of his mission. for a girl that's always said no, i'm finally saying yes.

God has blessed me with some amazing roommates and a house that i don't deserve. on top of that i'm a part of a group of freshman girls who are changing me every day, and i bet they don't even know it.

rachel woltjer is yesterday's news. i'm ready to be a part of something bigger.

2010 started right where it should...in the fellowship of 22,000 missional college students singing praises unto God. it's a bit daunting to launch my first year of full submission to my purpose - the one set out for me long ago.

God is good. and i am not. I can't wait to tell of the amazing things that He has done...one year from now.

thank-full.

there was a very good chance i wasn't going to write this blog. for a number of reasons..thanksgiving was an entire week ago...the story is a bit disturbing...i don't have much wit to throw in it. but after leaving chapel today, i knew i had to.

the speaker said something today that stuck out to me, something i unfortunately identified with. he noted that "right after october 31st, stores skipped right over thanksgiving to Christmas...the next profit-driven holiday. some of you celebrated Thanksgiving last thursday...but i'm guessing what you were actually celebrating was black friday."

there's not much to buy in middle of nowhere montana, but i can identify with not realizing the importance of Thanksgiving.

i bought my train ticket to montana a few months ago and couldn't wait for a relaxing weekend to spend with perhaps my favorite woman in the world. i had twilight in my bag and knew i could have an entertaining read between games of cards and delicious snacks. probably the most ideal weekend i could think of.

Sarah and i hopped on the train late Thursday night. i sat down and the man across the aisle immediately started talking to me. he asked "how are you?" i could tell he was about 30-years-old, mentally handicapped and that he was in complete and utter pain. not physical pain...but emotional pain. as soon as i responded, "i'm alright, how about you?" he burst into tears, literally sobbing uncontrollably. i could hardly understand what he was saying and after asking him to repeat it for the third time i heard loud and clear: "i'm so lonely and no one cares about me."

i immediately froze. what would you say to him in that moment? i had no idea. so i asked him to tell me why he was on the train and where he was going. he asked if he could sit in my seat with me and i knew that this man needed more than anything for someone to listen to him. i responded that my mom would be getting on the train soon, but he could sit on the inside until then. (at this point i was terrified...partly because i didn't know if he could hurt me but mostly because i had no idea how to lift this man up.) i prayed that the Lord would give me the words to say.

he sat in the seat and first told me that he was on the train going to seattle because his family had disowned him. i apologized (which we often do when we hear bad news...) and asked why. he told me that his sister had tried to murder him last week and when he told his parents they told him to leave and never come back. at this point, i can't imagine parents evil enough to disown their severely disabled son, and i had no idea that the evil in this story had barely even begun. i asked him if he was close with his father and he didn't respond. he started to sob again and i put my hand on his shoulder for a few minutes. a few long minutes. when he stopped crying he told me that his own father had raped him. at this point, i was out of words...it was i who could not respond. i began to cry with him, apologizing profusely for what had happened to him. then i asked him if his mother knew about it, and he said that she videotaped it. for someone who talks a lot, i was out of words. there was literally nothing in my vocabulary that i could respond to that with. at that point, my mom was getting on the train so i prayed with him and sent him back to his seat where he continued on being alone.

i couldn't sleep on the train. i was so angry at this world and the evil that is in it. sometimes i think that i've got this Christianity thing figured out - i'm ready for anything God throws at me. but if i heard anything that day from God it was "if you want to get engaged with a lost and a broken world, you have to be prepared for the kind of evil that is out there." but as a Christ-follower, it's not a choice for me. i am called to go out into the world and tell them what the cure for pain is. you are called to go out into the world.

it's not really a suggestion, it's a command.

God will use us in all sorts of different ways, maybe at work or through homeless ministry or through being kind to your checkout lady at target. maybe it's loving someone unconditionally or listening to a man sitting next to you on the train.

i failed. the way this blog is written, i seem like a saint i'm sure. but i'm far from it. the whole time i was talking with him, i was hoping we'd stop soon so my mom would come take his seat and i'd stop feeling guilty about my own life. for those of you that don't know me real well, my career path is evangelism - it's what i'm going to college for. and i failed this man. he knew i was a Christian and i tossed him to the side, just as i'm sure many other Christians had done before. i'm not saying that the Lord couldn't or didn't use my failure, but it exposed me for who i really was. i must live in a bubble if a story like that would leave me absolutely speechless and shocked. if i took a step into the world, i would see it all around me.

people are hurting. everywhere. they may think they know what they need - companionship, love, possessions...whatever fits the hole in their heart for the longest amount of time. but i happen to possess the greatest piece of information that anyone has ever known - a piece of information that would change the world if everyone knew it. it is the cure to every kind of pain.

it's Jesus.

he died for me, but he also died for Hans, the 32-year-old man on the train. he died for the homeless person that is standing on the street corner next to a stoplight you pass everyday. he died so that they may bring their burdens to him, so that he may give them rest.

get out of your house. get out of Bethel. get out of your church walls. get out of your car.

people need your message.

they need the truth.

but if you're going to become engaged with a lost and broken world, you have to be prepared for what's out there.

purple socks.

it is 3:15am, i'm about to go to bed. i must admit, i did not brush my teeth.

it's a weird day when you've been awake for approximately 18 hours and you can't remember when you woke up. why did i wear a hat today instead of showering? was the jacket part of the ensemble or was i supposed to take it off when i got to class? did i really not notice that one of my socks was blue and the other was lavender? is lavender spelled with an 'e' or an 'a'?

and so on.

my day was filled with much of..well..nothing productive. 18 hours worth of unproductivity. i even let sarah and laura beat me in rook.

well i suppose i should go to bed. tomorrow awaits. with much on the docket. i'm just saying that. my socks are different colors. yeah.

man in the mirror.

wow. i just took a jog down memory lane via some old posts. it's funny to see how life happens and how we respond to it in the moment. i doubt i could recall a lot of the events i blogged about now, but at the time they were pressing enough to publish.

i'm gonna try keep this thing going...we'll see how well i do. this semester has been odd...for someone who is an anti-hypochondriac, sickness has done quite a number on me these past few months. i got to hang out with some mononucleosis for about a month (no dad..i wasn't kissing anyone...) and got a sweet aftertaste of some strep throat, which i'm currently trying to kick. fatigue equals not my friend. it sucks. i'd rather have constant projectile vomitation, or even IBS. as long as i can stay awake. but thanks to drugs i'm gonna say "seeya" to sickness and tiredness.

what have i been up to for the past few months? i suppose the people that read this haven't heard much from me lately, and i lament that very much. i hope my next few posts can make up for a few months of absence. but i would like to dedicate this blog to someone very special, and someone i admire very much. sir michael jackson, the king of pop.

i remember exactly where i was when i learned of michael jackson's death. i was in jean's front yard, on 19 gillam way, attempting to start a weed wacker. it was then that my sister informed me of the death of perhaps one of my favorite singers. it was somewhat nice to mourn his death in alaska, apart from the media criticism. what a sad ending to a sad life.

upon my return to the lower 48, i learned of "this is it" - a documentary of michael's final tour. i marked my calendar for oct. 27th, anxiously awaiting the release.



i was finally able to see it last friday, and it far exceeded my already high expectations. he is truly the king of pop. not only are his songs timeless, his dancing has completely changed how the art form is projected. it would have no doubt been the most phenomenal tour of all time. and he died 8 days before it started. pure tragedy. (a quick taste):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yov4PcwJi18

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6WK9Y9WjPTM&feature=related

if i may, i'd like to give my opinions on michael's life. which are purely opinion, and nothing else. take it or leave it. michael had a rough life. he was objectified from a young age and exposed to many things pre-teens should not be. he lacked the love that he so desperately needed (that we all need) from his father. but instead of displacing that love through a variety of harmful activities, he tried to recreate it. it can't look good to have young boys in your bed as a middle-aged man, but i can somewhat understand what michael was trying to do. take macaulay culkin for instance...that kid had the worst home life ever, his parents were terrible. i bet if you asked him, he probably appreciated michael's attempt to show him love.

am i saying mike's tactics are right? actually, i'm not saying that at all. what i am saying is...props for trying. none of us actually know what real love is. some of us have been lucky to have a taste...maybe in your salvation moment...but it's pretty hard to live in that love all of the time. so instead we seek that love elsewhere. and i think michael was doing just the same. if you catch the movie, you'll notice how many times he says "it's all for love". and maybe he did find true love before he died, in Christ. we may never know. but let us not criticize his attempt to find real, true love. because..isn't that..essentially..what we are all trying to do?

rest in peace, michael. thanks for the tunes.

- rach.

seriously.

sometimes i take myself too seriously. i get to thinking i'm really important. usually when this happens - everything is going the way i would expect it to. i wake up in the morning to my alarm, bike to class, go to class, have random conversations. nothing too out of the ordinary. but sometimes...just sometimes...things catch me off guard. and i realize that life is kind of funny, and i'm not that important. this is one of those times:

yesterday i was helping laura move all of her stuff into her house. well...partially helping...partially playing with her new tivo. i was scrolling through the "guide" on her tv, taping tv shows that i wanted to watch. sometimes i'll click the "info" button to see what a particular episode is about. i saw that the new Survivor was premiering on thursday (today) and wanted to see where it was, so i clicked "info". and this is what it said:

"The team investigates a string of murders linked to a scam involving valuable poker chips; Langston has to use deadly force for the first time."

WHAT?! i remember the days when Survivor was about alliances and cute underwater challenges. Deadly force?!! On television?!

a few seconds after my rant in disgust, i realized i had accidentally clicked on CSI: Crime Scene Investigation.

i can't take myself too seriously...life is no fun that way. and no matter how important i think i am, i still have to run the mile and a half today for the freshman gym class that i'm finally taking.

CAKER!!

I'M BACK!!!

you know how season premieres are usually pretty epic? i've been waiting for something epic to happen ever since i left alaska.

and last night, it happened.

the 1st annual CAKER at coach j's house.

you may be asking yourself, what in the heck is a caker? well, let me explain it this way. do you know what a kegger is? i don't, i go to bethel. so we had to find an alternative. when booze isn't the focus of a party, something else has to be. right? why not CAKE?

in total we had 18 cakes and 200 cupcakes (in the shape of shots). we had a "frosting bar" - where you could frost a cupcake shot:



we also had some pong going on in the garage...


cake pong that is...


we also had some general "shot" taking in the kitchen...


not to mention the dance party downstairs that hit a minimum of 30 people...


and with so many cakes, there had to be a winner. the best cake of the '09 caker is...

"under the big top"

all in all, the first party @ coach j's was a success. the cops only came once during the party, and once after. how crazy is it that there were 100 people in our house and nobody was drinking? pretty sweet if you ask me - it was awesome. although i do feel a little hungover from too many cupcakes. oh and we finally got a roommate picture!

have a great week. and if you're in the bethel area and are craving some cake - come get some leftovers. PLEASE?!

:) BYE!